


Hogwarts and the department of education

by Bacner



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, ROWLING J.K. - Fandom
Genre: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (mentioned), Death Eaters, Drabble, Education, F/M, Gen, Hogwarts, OCs - Freeform, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-12-24 06:58:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21095309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bacner/pseuds/Bacner
Summary: Of life and times in the department of education in HP world.





	Hogwarts and the department of education

**Author's Note:**

  * For [beckysue_bonner](https://archiveofourown.org/users/beckysue_bonner/gifts).

> Some of the characters are OCs, actually. Anything else is J-Ro's.

“Why did you think that the ministry of magic has a department of education?” stated the missive.

Abby Klinemichael wordlessly just stared at it. What strange demands, and signed by Hogwarts’ new headmaster, too!

“Mr. Ramses, I think it’s to you. Signed by the headmaster of Hogwarts.”

The head of the department read the letter and snorted disdainfully.

“The folk at Hogwarts are getting out of hand. They need new desks? Tell them to ask Mr. Malfoy instead. And, oh yes, send them a request of the list of the students that actually came to school. When the reply will arrive, send the headmaster a critique regarding his lack of PR work among Britain’s magical populace.”

“Why, are they necessary?” asked Mercury Fowlish, as he broke away from his crossword puzzle in the “Prophet”.

His superior just shrugged.

“Oh, they will be. Miss Klinemichael, compose an appropriate paper and date with the beginning of the previous month. This will teach them to respect us!”

“Yes sir,” Abby summoned an appropriate quill (gift from her cousin Rita the journalist) and began to narrate to it: “To the headmaster of Hogwarts. In regards to the previous month...”

Mercury just shrugged and returned to his crossword, and Mr. Ramses also returned – to his report regarding the well-being of the educated populace of Britain’s witches and wizards.

Headmaster Snape decided apparently not to reply to the department’s missive. Instead, the department got visited by Bellatrix Lestrange’s eldest daughter V’iera Nocturna, and her brother in law, Rastaban, who was grinning in his trademark way.

“So, why the ministry of magic does need a department of education?” V’iera asked straight-away, unsheathing her wand. Rastaban, meanwhile, leaned towards Mercury and continued to grin, reeking of cheap poteen and expensive madness.

“Um, to help Hogwarts?” Abby meekly asked, hoping that Miss Nocturna will remember her from the Vampire Slayer meetings. “Right?”

“Aren’t you clever,” V’iera grinned. “Is it your department?”

“No,” Abby said meekly. “Mr. Ramses-“

“Wrong answer,” Rastaban interrupted their discussion. “Crucio!”

“Congratulations on your promotion. Uncle Rastaban, stop it, or I’ll tell the parents!”

With these words, the younger Lestranges apparated somewhere, leaving Abby in charge, apparently. As the rest of the department helped Mr. Ramses recover from the Unforgivable, and to offer Abby their congratulations, Abby was ordering new desks to Hogwarts straightaway.

The next missive from Hogwarts was delivered by Rastaban Lestrange once more. It involved paint and other school supplies that were running out.

“But we’ve got no moneys for that!” Mercury tried to argue as Rastaban once again loomed over him with a look in his eye that promised nothing good or wholesome.

Abby hurriedly turned to Ramses.

“Mr. Ramses? Go to the goblins; tell them that we need extra finances.”

“But we will be refused, Abby... I mean, Miss Klinemichael.”

“Have Mr. Lestrange go with you,” Abby pointedly not looked at the Death Eater. “I’m sure the goblins will understand, and if they don’t, there’s always the ministry of finances – do they have any vacancies?”

Fortunately, the bluff worked. However, Mr. Ramses decided not to wait for the third visit and quit, planning perhaps to join the Order of the Phoenix. Mercury, too, quit, but only to join the “Prophet’s” staff as the writer of crossword puzzles. Frankly, Abby didn’t miss them – V’iera and other Vampire Slayers would often come over to chat and to deliver various small letters from the headmaster of Hogwarts and so on.

After all, indeed, why did the ministry of magic have a department of education?

As Abby Klinemichael rose in social and financial status, she kept her opinion firmly to herself.

End


End file.
